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What do you do?

What do you do? 


How often I have been asked this question by people who I have met for the first time. It encompasses so many answers within it that often I am left wondering about how to answer it. All of us have encountered a question like this, specially the older women - people generally just assume that that younger ones have a job somewhere - they are asked : "Are you working somewhere? "


Personally I feel that there really  is no straight forward answer to this question. 


At any given time of the day, like so many of my friends we play different roles. 


Early in the morning, I am the relaxed housewife, having a cup of tea with Pran in the verandeh, enjoying the weather and the garden. 


A little later I am the cook and the home manager, sorting out the day's schedule. 


A little later I am the content provider writing my assignments, doing the projects assigned to me. 


By afternoon time I am the grandmother indulging my grandchildren and watching them play or chatting wit…

SILENCE

I do not know who wrote this - someone just sent it in my email. But it is beautifully and simply written.


( If anyone knows the name of the author, please do let me know. Thanks)

Too many women in too many countries

speak the same language of silence.

My grandmother was always silent, always aggrieved

Only her husband had the cosmic right (or so it was said)

to speak and be heard.

They say it is different now.

(After all, I am always vocal and my grandmother

thinks I talk too much)

But sometimes I wonder.

When a woman shares her thoughts, as some women do,

graciously, it is allowed.

When a woman fights for power, as all women would like

to, quietly or loudly, it is questioned.

And yet, there must be freedom - if we are to speak

And yes, there must be power -  if we are to be heard.

And when we have both (freedom and power) let us now be

Are we care-givers or care-takers ?

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Care-givers are people who spend their time taking care of others - and care-takers in this context are individuals who are recipients of the concern and care from others. A bit different from the normal connotations of these words, but this does make more sense doesn't it?
They took care of us - and today we miss that care and concern

As we get older our responsibilities seem to increase. When the children are young, we keep waiting for them to grow up so that we no longer feel responsible for every action of theirs. But as we and they grow older we realize that worrying about them and thinking that all their problems have to be solved by us has just become a habit. We constantly think of ourselves as care givers - giving care, taking care of children and grandchildren and parents and everyone else around us.
Is this just a habit?
For me this is definitely true - I am just one of those people who loves to organise everyone's lives. Do this, do it this way and let me help you do i…

Of Bugs and Beaches and Missed Flights

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The Beach at Langkawi


Holidays give you so much to cheer about. There is a change of surrounding, a relaxed time to spend with friends and an ability to do what we want and when we want. There is so much joy in them, that even a 15 day bug cannot take away from good memories and happy times. 
Thank heavens for friends and for the gift of being able to go away when we want to and where we want to.
We are truly blessed.
Kuala Lumpur or Langkawi or Colombo - where did we pick up the bug from? Did it travel in our suitcase or in our wallets or was it just something which decided to come and give all of us some painful and tiring memories.





Eagle Point at Langkawi

An explanation is needed.

We traveled for nine days in a group of eight to Kuala Lumpur and Langkawi and Colombo. The holiday was very nice - KL was more of a shopping expedition than anything else! A day spent in Genting Highlands was interesting - we played roulette and won enough to pay for our lunch - and the hotel was very interes…

New Surroundings - maybe they are not so new after all !

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S-145, Panchshila Park



Vasant Vihar seems  a bit like home now, not completely but the areas are beginning to look familiar, I do not wake up and wonder where I am any more and I still call S-145 my home but then I also call C 6/6 home.

Why do we get so attached to bricks and mortar? Why is it that some place gives you great vibes and welcomes you, whereas in some homes as soon as you enter there is a desire to leave. We have always hoped that our home will be a welcoming one, a place where people were welcome to come when they want and stay as long they want - to some extent!. We feel that we have achieved it where ever we have lived and maybe our friends feel that to.

Homes are our lifeline, they make or break our moods. They are places where we can look for happiness for ourselves or just sit back and make ourselves miserable. But we forget that each home is a new place and we have to establish the atmosphere and the ambiance ourselves. We can carry memories of our previou…

Some thoughts on moving house after 20 years

As we prepare to move to a new home in Vasant Vihar, mainly due to family obligations, both of us are going through a period of introspection and of wondering what the future holds for us.
We are getting older, an undeniable fact! We are getting slower and more lethargic, another undeniable fact! We are happy to move house - now that is where the facts begin to get muddled up, that is where we are not too sure about what is happening and whether it is the correct decision to make.
The decision was not an easy one - my husband agreed to move faster than I did. I wavered back and forth. Spoke to many friends and relatives, took too many opinions and spent many nights just sitting and staring at the walls. What finally made the decision for me was one evening when I could not even turn round into my road for 30 minutes because of the traffic mess all around. Then it felt that enough was enough and a decision was confirmed.
Do our children agree with us? I am not too sure, they are also ambi…