On becoming Grandparents, for the third time !!
Just thought I would write down some thoughts on becoming a grandparent again. We have two grandchildren ages 5 and 2 and a half. Our third grandchild was born on December 18th, a gorgeous little baby boy.
I spoke earlier about why is it different being a grandparent? Is it because we are only part time parents or is it because we are wiser and older ? Are they special because they are our children's children or is it also the realisation that time is fleeting and we have learnt to enjoy the children without being stressed about how they are being reared.
These are questions that I ask because I do not have the answers for them. All I do know is that they are our best stress busters, and just a hug or a flying kiss from them seems to be the greatest gift we have ever been given. Do you remember the hugs that your children gave you? Or the first time they turned round and said "I love you"? The grandchildren say it easily and artlessly and you respond in the same manner.
But if you have become a grandparent for the first time, here is some very sane advice. It may seem irreverant and inane, but believe me this is experience talking and writing !!
- Do not offer any advice, unless asked for. They have read all the books, done all the research and they know all the answers.
- Forget how you brought your children up. The rules have changed, the environment has changed, you have to adjust to their rules.
- Always be there to lend a helping hand. They will turn to you, sometimes reluctantly s a last resort, but enjoy the moment !!
- Do not give up your life for them. Adjust according to your schedule, but retain your interests. make the space for them.
- Indulge your grandchildren. The parents will object, ( remember how angry you were when your parents indulged your children!!) But then what are grandparents for - for hugs and kisses, for chocolates and gifts and for broad shoulders to cry on.
- Remember as we grow older, we have less and less time left. Enjoy it to the hilt - your bones may hurt and your mind may be slow - but adjust yourself to that and go ahead and enjoy yourself to the best of your ability.
Life after sixty - can be as slow or as fast as you want it to be. This is true for all ages, but once you are sixty, most of your responsibilities have been dealt with - hopefully. Now is the time to join your classes or courses, to watch all the plays and listen to all the concerts and to play with your grandchildren whenever you want to !!